Tuesday, June 2, 2009

Lindens and Latin Lap Dances

Last night, while on another shopping adventure around the grid in search of a see-through nightie (don't ask, I'm not tellin') I got an IM from one of my friends. He was excited when he had accidentally stumbled upon some kind of meeting with a Linden at the helm and offered me a tp.

Since we're on the subject of Lindens, let me pause for a second and ask if ya'll have noticed them popping up a lot more lately? Just an observation.


I took him up on his offer, I was tired of shopping and welcomed the chance to spend time with a good friend. When I arrived, I found a gathering of avatars surrounding a small table. Seated at the head of the table, was Blue Linden.

My friend and I stood quietly in the back as a lady with a strong accent asked questions on voice, which were answered by Blue via text. Most of the questions were your standard fare, topics covered numerous times on the "official" blogs and in various news articles. My friend and I exchanged text privately, thought provoking repartee, commenting on the meeting in progress:

Me: "Dude.. this is just like Wedding Crashers. They have no idea we don't belong here"

Friend: "It's okay, I think I can take Blue if I have to."

Me: "Reckon there'll be snacks? I could go for some cheese and crackers... oooo and punch. Green punch with those floaty ice chunks would totally rock."

Friend: "Shhh.. someone just said "porn."

I kinda lost track of the discussion around then. They were talking about servers and copybots and.. ya know.. stuff. I was considering bailing out when this guy showed up:

Me: "I wanna monkey!"

That's when things started getting interesting. The monkey dude totally lept into Blue Linden's lap.

I swear.. I think he was giving him a simean lap dance. I would have taken pictures of the actual act, but I was too busy laughing my ass off.

I think someone must have IMed the monkey because suddenly he leaps from the table and starts saying crap like, "Why did you tp me here? I didn't know I was on the table. What is this?" and I was all like.. dude.. If you're going to give a Linden a monkey lap dance.. you should totally own it.

Don't wuss out. Gawd.

After the lap dance, someone offered Blue a moist towelette for a quick cleanup (okay, I made that last part up, this isn't like.. the Enquirer or some crap) and Blue said he had a question. He asked what group what group the onlookers were members of.

What? He didn't even know what was going on?

Suddenly I didn't feel as bad.

It was soon discovered that we'd dropped in on a university group of Spanish speaking folks taking part in some kind of research.. or something.

Now I was really worried someone might engage me in conversation. My Spanish is limited to the .99 menu at the Taco Bell drive-thru.

Soon it was over, Blue Linden left, the monkey hung his little head in sadness and there was an explosion of excited chatter.. all in Spanish.. when my friend and I decided it was time to make our exit.

I'm still not clear on what was going on. I suspect Blue stumbled upon the group by accident, but who knows?

All I know is.. everyone should get to see a monkey give a lap dance at least once in their lifetime, even if it's in Second Life.

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